This year for Halloween I embraced my inner St. Nick! I put on my jolly with a pillow under my belt to celebrate the Eve of All Hallows. In my travels throughout the night I got some very important business taken care of, as it is my duty to know who has been bad and good (so be good for goodness sake)!
First I met my cousins, the R-well gals. We were on the phone playing a live game of Where\’s Waldo. They told me to wave so we could find each other. I threw my arm up with a big, \”Ho! Ho! Ho!\” and across the street two young ladies threw their heads back in delight! Found you!
We continued down the cobblestone lane, past all the fruits of the loom, and I came face to face with a double of myself: an identical Claus. The moment was surreal: this other Santa was standing next to a penguin and as soon as I met him head on, another penguin appeared next to me. The four of us stood there across from our carbon copies as if we were standing in a mirror box. We had just frozen time. A seam must have torn apart to sponsor this moment so I sewed myself back into the crowd.
At the Waterfront I happened upon Grandma, who got run over by a reindeer. She was a slightly befuddled in her nightclothes with curlers in her hair, but charming despite the hoof prints. I apologized for the herd\’s clumsiness. \”The team is undergoing a rigorous training regimen to ensure the safety of everyone this Christmas,\” I assured her. \”But since you are so delightful and understanding, I am forwarding your name straight to Nice!\”
At the bar I invited those who wanted a one on one meeting: \”Now who wants to sit on Santa\’s lap?!\” And of course, in came Clark Kent! He was looking quite sharp in his business attire, but perhaps the secret was out because his S emblazoned undershirt was showing. Kent was clearly concerned about Lex Luther. I told him I would see what my reckless reindeer could do about that. Kent\’s next wish was for Lois: some nice lingerie. \”Now that\’s the spirit of giving that I like to see! Bravo Clark! You\’ve made the nice list this year!\”
Just about everyone made the nice list this year because it was such a joyful All Saints Eve! I even spied Grandma breaking it down with Rudolph on the dance floor! Boy was it a heartening sight to see those two together! It made me so Happy about Christmas that all the way home I cheered, \”Merry Halloween!\”